When Romance Backfires

I was going through boxes and boxes of photos stored in the garage this evening. I was actually looking for my girls school photos, but somehow ended up looking at everything else. You ever do that…look for one thing and end up doing something else entirely? The kids old stuffed toys, cassette tapes from the late 80’s….it was a walk down memory lane. One such find didn’t give me any warm and fuzzy feelings….in fact I cringed and began tearing the photo up. Why did I keep this pic? …and what was I thinking at the time???!

If you have been following this blog you would have read some of my previous entertaining stories on how I have romanced my partner Mitchell. Cooking a nice meal and putting out the candles….rose petals on the bed….all that sweet mushy stuff 😉 Well this photo reminded me of how even my best laid plans have backfired. My intention was to create a nice, relaxing atmosphere….all it ended up doing was causing mayhem!


Mitchell and I travelled to Bendigo (located very close to the geographical centre of the state of Victoria) a few years ago for a friend’s wedding. No kids and a weekend of fun, I thought it would be a great idea to book a room with nice views, a king sized bed and a spa. On our arrival we soon discovered that due to recent floods, the water was not the best quality. We checked to make sure the mini fridge was stocked of bottle water, changed into our evening wear and headed out to the wedding. The reception was fabulous and as result we had to leave the car at the venue and catch a taxi back to our motel.

A few too many glasses of bubbly and I had a night full of fun I wanted to make a start on. So I went into the ensuite and began filling the tub with warm water. A sign on the bench advised that due to the discolouration of the water, it was suggested guests use the complimentary bubble bath. I guess it was to hide the milky, murky water. Ok…but how much should I use? I had no idea, so I decided to add the bottle…the entire bottle!! I shut the door as I left the room and decided to have another glass of wine. Walking back into the ensuite, the bubbles were overflowing onto the floor tiles – oops. I stripped off, jumped in and called out for Mitch to join me.

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Nuzzling into the corner I was all nice and cosy. All I needed was a few more bubbles, since most were on the floor. I reached over to the button turned it on and was delighted to see more froth growing around me….this was fun, or so I thought. As I nuzzled back into my corner I felt an uncomfortable twitch in my lower back. Fuzzy brain and all, my reaction was a tad slow. The noise that started from underneath me had me laughing…wth….it sounded like someones car engine was about to explode, except it was coming from under my butt! The pain was increasing in my back and through the fog in my brain I realised something wasn’t quiet right.

I called out for Mitch, who was on the balcony, to come save me from the spa. He thought I was being silly. No – the spa was trying to eat me and I wasn’t happy. I began squealing like a banshee and finally Mitch came to the rescue, bouncing off walls and door frames along the way. My knight in shining armour was battling to keep his own two feet from folding out from underneath him…I was on my own. I did some kind of a drunken bath roll and managed to use the heel of my right foot to whack the button. The spa was off, the floor of our ensuite stopped vibrating and I was now crying.

Screen Shot 2015-10-09 at 10.24.34 pm

As soon as Mitch gained his balance and helped me out of the spa, I was finally able to take a look at my back. I was shocked. I think everyone within a 5 kilometre radius heard me shriek. The bruising and burst blood vessels on my lower back was the size of a coffee cup, along with a circular pattern that was imprinted in my skin. Mitchell pulled out the plug and got ice from the freezer. After helping me onto the bed, which was a feat in itself, I soon had small blocks of ice, wrapped in a tea towel, sitting on my back. After a gurgle and a burp courtesy of the ensuites plumbing, we went back in to take a look. There in the corner I was nuzzled into was the inlet or water suction valve, with a missing cover.

Suffice to say, we didn’t end up enjoying the spa, the king sized bed or the rest of the weekend. I made a complaint to the front desk the next morning and was told it was my own fault. I should have checked the spa before I used it! I have never been back! I have learned to be more careful and while I still enjoy adding some spice to our lives, spas and bubble bath have never crossed my mind again. Well, that was until tonight. I can laugh about it now, but back then….all my romantic plans flew out the window. Or in my case, went down the drain! I will always be a romantic person….just a little more sensible these days 🙂

x x x

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